Sunday, December 6, 2009

Silent moments...


Along with the wave of time, moments pass..
But still somehow their memories last..
In these moments I wanted to speak something
But don't know why..
My lips don't go with heart..!
Just like every wave of the sea,
Comes to speak to the beautiful shore..
But without uttering a single word..
It goes back in silent mode..!
Yet these silent moments,
even in silence express in a way so wise.
Knowingly-unknowingly..
spoken-unspoken words,
come out through silent eyes..!
These silent moments,
leave their imprint on the sands of time..
Slowly - slowly marks will vanish..
But memories in heart,
will remain forever alive...!!!

Saturday, December 5, 2009

The forgotten guitar..



These guitar tones
singing in the air..
With all the tunes
of moonless nights..
They bring me despair..
I remember..
I've heard them before..
they once brought me smiles..
Now whenever I listen to them,..
my heart worries..
soul cries..!
These guitar tones,
they make me mourn..
On the days..
that are all done..
With only memories ..
to carry on...!

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Dream and reality...

I dreamt that I was sitting
by my beloved's side,
Filling my eyes with unmatched beauty..
Alas! I could not sleep forever,
Waking up I wished..
My dream would have been reality.
Just the next day..
by the slip of fate,we parted.
My heart's agony let out a silent scream
My soul also cried aloud..
everything was unfair it seemed..
I wished ,the reality
would have been just a dream....!

Monday, August 31, 2009

I MISS YOU EVERYDAY..


STORY OF A GIRL..WHO WAS NEVER SUPPOSED TO FEEL THIS WAY....

Not even a day goes by when I don't think of you. You seem to spring out of nowhere into my imagination, even if I am happy or sad. Why did I fall in love with you? I do not know. I am just not able to fall out of it. It was September and I met you online ,you were different I could tell. It started with a few chats and some weeks later I discovered that I cannot stop thinking about you . I tried to read a book and there you were staring me on every page. I stayed up all night and wrote for you..poems..stories and what not.You became an integral part of my life.I remember you were the first person who took my tears in the palm of your hand and said,"Please don't cry, you are wasting a million..every time you shed these precious tears". Funny..i never thought that you would be the person who would give me only tears for the rest of my life.
Then the day came when you needed to leave the city for your better future.You said,"Don't worry..we'll be in touch". Your calls and letters came regularly, but then they stopped coming. It took you only six months.I was heart broken. Unlike you, I gave you everything I had.I tried to contact you many times..but you never replied to my calls..my letters.
Since that day I have been running from myself. I never found "ME" again.I recollect all those memories and tears fall from my eyes. But this time you are not there to hold them and say those words again. I still miss you, I still love you .The only difference is ,I don't love the man you are now. The real "YOU" is still with me .The "YOU" I loved exists no more in reality but only in my imagination. You know what, this "YOU" will be the same forever, he will never change as my feelings don't tend to change. You are not the man I loved.Strange isn't it? I am too not the girl you met long back. I never smiled wholeheartedly since 2 years 8 months 30 days 4 hours and 9 minutes....:(

P.S.-Its just a write..None of this happened..!

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Numb...

Eyes dried long ago...
I am so used to pain..
That it doesn't hurt anymore.
You never cared
never thought of me..
Is this how..
It was supposed to be...?

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Love letter..!


Before i met u ,i didn't have any clue tat what love was all about. Tat time i just thought of myself. But when you came in my life,u turned my whole world. i truly found out what love is...its Such a beautiful thing. Food lost its flavor, whole world seemed hazy and i didn't even remember what was going on around me..the only thing that mattered was you. Your smile made me realize that everything is OK in this world..n i just started thinking this world is not less than any heaven...
I never told you about all this..but i guess you knew..!

When you left..i just couldn't control my tears..tat was the worst feeling..I felt like I am no more alive and thought of ripping my heart out of my chest, hoping n praying tat if i did so,it wouldn't hurt me as it did before.Losing someone you love is the worst feeling and it even brings worst to you!
I tried to convince myself ..I don't want you anymore.
But I just couldn't let u go away from my heart,mind n soul..

the hardest thing in life,
is watching your love fade away
your heart wants to speak a lot..
but now there is no chance to say..!

I want this story to end because I'm living to die and dying to live, but it won't mean anything to me, until n unless I have you. I felt so good when I was with you.u made me feel tat this world is really a beautiful place. Love felt like heaven earlier; and now when you're gone its hurting like hell.

The hardest thing to see,
is the one you loved..sets you free.
you're smiling ..but your heart says,
please don't do this to me..!

I miss you so much.I know its too late now and I've lost you forever -- but dear,you didn't lose my love because i loved you ever since the day i met you and I'll never forget you, because to me, you are the WORLD...!

those were the best days of my life...

-saumya shrivastava!

Thursday, July 16, 2009

she doesn't know...!


Her mind is covered with painful dreams..
She is not confident as she seems..
She looks at night and wonders why..?
There is some fear,she can't deny..!
Disgust bubble and boil in her veins..
Tries to be cool but can't remain..
Fed up with life
Still she strifes..
Thinking may be someday she'll depart from pain
Nothing to lose..even less to gain
Depressed she is..
But what she wants,she won't let go..
She has no chance left..but she doesn't know..!

Sunday, July 12, 2009

YAADEIN...


Holle se chupke se aati hain yaadein..
Ateet me hume kheench le jaati hain yaadein..
Koshish to ke the bhoolne ke aapko..
Par har koshish ko nakaam kar jaate hain yaadein..

Tez hawa ka jhonka bankar aati hain yaadein..
Is shaant zindagi me hulchul le aati hain yaadein..
Fir dheere se humara haath thaam kar..
Khwabon ke duniya me le jaati hain yaadein..

Kya maksad hai inka, kyu aati hain yaadein..
Beete hue baatein, dohraate hain yaadein..
Ab peeche reh gaya hai sab..
Aur chal pade hain hum..
Ab to yaadein he yaadein hain..yaadein he yaadein..
Bas yaad aati hain baatein.....yaad aati hain yaadein......

Heart filled with a new emotion.."REGRET".





Slamming the door loudly behind her..she falls on her knees ,begging her heart to stop aching.She knows tat its the time to let it go...she deserves so much better than what he gave.Still she is not able to forget.Actually her heart never permits her to do so. His voice still give her butterflies,even more than before.She remembers ...when they fell in love with each other.May be she took him for granted.Always focusing on the past,not taking the things the way she should have.She feels a new emotion ...REGRET!!!!!!
She'll kiss his picture and bid it goodnight before tucking it underneath her pillow - wrapped up in a faded black aeropostale hoodie.She inhales deep enough,the smell from that hoodie fills her senses with furtive happiness....All his favorite songs are in her play list,playing all through the night. Some make her smile while some bring tears.What she misses the most and what hurts her the most is his voice that she could listen even when he remained silent..The voice that melted her heart....
Now that voice is heard in her dreams..she misses their talks,those special moments,the blushing smile that came on his face at the mention of her name or whenever he looked at her.
Hope,love,despair are the only emotions that shine in young girl's eyes.They both were once friends in love,unbreakable,inseparable...Just 2 innocent kids so deep in love. Even in the crowd they had eyes on each other.So beautiful days they were.But now things are not the same.
That young girl cries tonight.Right after kissing his years old picture, she decides to listen to an old voice mail and then silently goes to sleep...........

Saturday, July 11, 2009

The one i met in the depth of my heart..!

I sat at my window during night,
i peeped out and saw stars shining bright.
when i profoundly looked at them,
i saw there a star..solitary and dim!
Gazing that star..i started thinking,
why isn't that star.....shining n blinking.
why is that star so alone..and sad,
myriad questions in my mind i had.
contemplating that star....
in the depth of my heart....
i met someone melancholy n alone,
i went a bit nearer...i heard a moan.
the person there was weeping,
didn't get what was that soul seeking.
the star i saw came in my mind,
i thought this prsn is of same kind.
away from the shining world...
both of them gloomy and solitary....
there might be some desperation..
to them nothing seemed merry..
i got a little idea about that person,
but i didn't see that face.
wanted to know who is there,
i wanted to end up the chase.
so i went closer and closer.....
that face..
i was able to see.....
i was still,i ws shocked..
it ws no one else..it ws me!

Hiding Tears...

i said...i am hurt
you nevr asked why..?
u saw me crying..
but you jus passed by..!
i don't understand
why your love makes me feel dis way
whenever i hear your voice
to hide my tears..i walk away.
you call my name,
i slowly retreat..
you walk towards me...
my heart starts to beat...
faster...and faster..
wid each step you take,
my pain grows larger...
because i knw...
things will never be d same again....!

The Lost Beauty...

glancing at tear..a glisten in eyes,
to where ocean embraces the infinite skies..
n thinking if love can reach far to sunset's line,
will true hearts ever find happiness divine..

promises often seem like butterflies,
they fly away and gradually die..
with a promise to each other they wait,
will those two hearts ever meet by fate?

masking their agony with smile and love,
searching for lost beauty blessed from above.
at times tears out of pain will fall ,
but those two hearts will overcome all...

facing the hardships n waiting for the day,
when they'll find something good on way.
many weird things going on in mind,
the lost beauty..will true hearts ever find??

though heart is shattered and soul is weak
but for passion's sake they will seek.
to complete love's quest despite of all odds
true hearts will finally be entwined by God!

Simply wrong...!

wait..i cannot find words...
afraid...sad...numb..
does anybody understand?
does anybody care..?
old storyteller always lied..
"happily ever after"...
it was never real..never existed...
just a false thought inside my mind!
but wait..!
how can i go on without you?
breathe..walk..or feel..
u still care for me..i thought!
but may be...
i was simply wrong...!