Monday, May 30, 2011

Dear Danny........ :)


There just doesn't seem to be an easy way for me to say goodbye to you. We've shared so much life n laughter that it has become hard to imagine what things would be like..without you..!! I'm so grateful for the good times that we've shared. And whenever i'll think of you, as i so often will..it'll be the memories of those times that i'll keep comin bak to..!! Those lovely days...lovely moments...will always stay in my heart... no matter..how far you are..!!

Dear Danny....
Life is certainly taking a 'U' turn.. as the time is passing, its pretty clear that you're going to drift apart from me soon..!! I guess it is finally the time for me to acknowledge to you for all that we've shared..!!
I still remembr..how much you've teased me..irritated me...made me angry...and yet you've been the person,whom i care about the most. Whenever i've got something to share..whether happy..or sad...you're the 1st one who comes in my mind n whom i can speak my heart to... And No matter how serious life gets..i can get most stupid with you..without even thinking..wat u wud feel or comprehend///!
Remember the times i cried...Looking at my tears, you said "You have my swear..you wont ever bring them in your eyes.." And me...I used to promise evrytime...bt still cried fr stupid stuffs..!! Silly me..!!
I wondr upon your convincing ability...how soon u convinced me for making your SUPW..u know i loved the expression dat your face showed.. whenever you heard abt drawing and craft..And you..how carelessly used to put all your work upon me.. Idiot you are.. !! Evrytime..i said.."I'm not gonna make it...Get 'E' grade this time." n you.." i know that very well..you cant see, me getting E grade.."...
You know, i jus cant forget these small..little things. As such there isn't anything specific about them..that makes them memorable..!! but yet they remain close to my heart..!! Its again like.. i'm gettin lost in the memory lane..!!
I want you to always remember that smile on your face was and has always been my first priority. I would always want 2 see u smile..!! I apologize for d times when i hurt you...but t'was never intentional.. still m sorry...!!
Do you remember the stupid cartoons we made..shin chan,superman,spiderman,your trademark..and what not , Hollywood we played..n all those idiotic things we did at the back of our notebooks...!! Looking at them..puts up a smile upon my face..!!..you know...I STILL HAVE THOSE PAGES WITH ME>>!!
The list to this only you...is actually endless...!! I can pen down much more stuff... But i knw..you'll get bored of reading it...So i shud wind up nw..!!
You are..and you had always been so different. I want to let you know that you're d best human being..most helpful and caring person..n yeah..the best footballer too.. "LAMPARD>>" hehe.. ! But above all this, the thing dat means to me d most..is that "YOU ARE MY BEST FRIEND>>".Seriously...My love and admiration for you has increased so much since we've known each other.I dont know what comforts me ..when i'm with you..!! You have always been a great support to me..!! You were and will always be in my heart..!! I feel bound to the hands of fate..that i cant hold this time..!!
I dont actually wanna give a first taste of something dat i owe to you..!! So wherever you be..just take care of yourself..!! I feel i'm the luckiest persn to have someone like you as my best friend..! Be the same always..n be in touch wid me..!! I can't afford to lose you...!!
You might be feeling..how stupid i'm..! I said i'm winding up..but i end up writing..so much stuff..hehe..!! So its the time to say good bye now..!! All the very best fr your future..!! May u get all that you wish for..!
Take care..!! I'll miss you d most..!! You're simply a GEM..!!

With an ocean of Love and Care...
Mary...!!!!

Friday, April 2, 2010

Her unspoken love.....


Wet eyes, sad face...its the reflection of my wounded soul. I want to break free...want to forget all those moments..all those memories..that torture me. When you went away from me few months back, a little bit of me died. I always knew that you would never be the same and things would get worst one day. But I never knew..that day would come so soon.. I spelled out the truth what you really feel for me. I was hurt..deeply hurt.

Why did you do this to me..? My life changed at that very moment you left. I find myself on bended knees..yelling "WHY".. Even at your worst I was there for you. I believed all your lies,that others usually made fun of. Unlike you, I gave you everything I had. What more did u want? What was my mistake..? Why did you leave me..? Myriad questions are yet to be answered.

I tried a lot to convince myself that I don't want you anymore...but i failed miserably. As the days continue to pass, my love for you continues to mature and is growing beyond the realm of my heart. It seems as if you have the become the fiber of my soul..the very reason for my existence. I wish i would have told you more about it.

I miss the way you looked at me, the way you talked, the way you smiled, the way you walked..I miss everything about you. Whenever I struggle to forget all this, a small tear trickles down my cheek...making me realize that forgetting you is something impossible. The reality that you never cared for me didn't fade away from my sight. I still go back to those days of past. Thinking about you brings peace and calmness with the thoughts of what things would have been if you were here. Months have passed and you are still on my mind. Its true..sometimes love just isn't enough.

YOUR QUIETNESS STABBED MY HEART AND LEFT A SCAR FOREVER....!!!!

Friday, February 26, 2010

Lonely she is...


Scratching of the pen sounded rhythmic to her ears as if creating its own melody with each and every monotonous stroke. The two curves that created a tiny heart were etched deeply into the page with only a few strands from its predesigned course. Her delicate fingers skilfully guided it as if familiar with the pattern. Her hands grew weary with the repetition of the sketch.
The clock showed just a few minutes past to two o' clock at night. But it did nothing to subdue her persistent ritual. The empty sketch of the heart was not a time pass ,but a representation of the loneliness that haunted her. She willed to finally color the heart in..but was unable to lie to herself even in such feeble portrayal of her life.
She laid on her back, watching the unchanging ceiling once again. The spinning fan casting illuminating shadows around the room from the unusually bright moon. The window panes were once again left open as if they offered her some kind of escape to rest of the world and even outside her own mind. She rolled to her side holding her hands together past the pillow and spoke to an unseen person. Coming to terms with her inability to sleep, she reached to her bedside table, hesitating before flicking the light switch on. Next to it sat a notebook. She picked up the notebook. Grabbing the pen attached to it, she began to write...


" How is it making my life miserable day by day. I am left all alone and empty..dying in this mess. Also stings my own heart. I am left here in this dark place, holding on his promise and hoping that one day he'll be back and break all the shackles of pain,despair and sadness..that have coiled around me. A long time ago, i felt love. I lived because of it..but now i am dying because of it. No matter how hard i try, i know he'll never be the same again. I'll fall, broken and shattered into a million pieces. I need a hand to put me together and hold me forever. May be it'll only happen in my dreams...my fantasy. I am like a fallen angel left with no hope. A frozen heart that can only be melted by him. The love i felt earlier is gone with the wind.
I really don't know if he is my true love..or he is just a mistake, in future i would regret...."


Once again she lay awake, haunted by those memories. The familiar notebook sits on her lap and the sketches of heart lying all around her. Accepting the fact that she is again unable to sleep, she gives up tossing the notebook and takes his picture in her hand. A new rhythm helps her both to sleep and enjoy staying awake. Left on the bedside table in darkness, is the same notebook with just one realization scribbled on it.....!!!

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Love...


Love is what i would like to hold
close to my heart forever..
Though i may not often tell you..
But i think you know its true,
that i find immense happiness..
in each and every thought of you..!!

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Silent moments...


Along with the wave of time, moments pass..
But still somehow their memories last..
In these moments I wanted to speak something
But don't know why..
My lips don't go with heart..!
Just like every wave of the sea,
Comes to speak to the beautiful shore..
But without uttering a single word..
It goes back in silent mode..!
Yet these silent moments,
even in silence express in a way so wise.
Knowingly-unknowingly..
spoken-unspoken words,
come out through silent eyes..!
These silent moments,
leave their imprint on the sands of time..
Slowly - slowly marks will vanish..
But memories in heart,
will remain forever alive...!!!

Saturday, December 5, 2009

The forgotten guitar..



These guitar tones
singing in the air..
With all the tunes
of moonless nights..
They bring me despair..
I remember..
I've heard them before..
they once brought me smiles..
Now whenever I listen to them,..
my heart worries..
soul cries..!
These guitar tones,
they make me mourn..
On the days..
that are all done..
With only memories ..
to carry on...!

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Dream and reality...

I dreamt that I was sitting
by my beloved's side,
Filling my eyes with unmatched beauty..
Alas! I could not sleep forever,
Waking up I wished..
My dream would have been reality.
Just the next day..
by the slip of fate,we parted.
My heart's agony let out a silent scream
My soul also cried aloud..
everything was unfair it seemed..
I wished ,the reality
would have been just a dream....!

Monday, August 31, 2009

I MISS YOU EVERYDAY..


STORY OF A GIRL..WHO WAS NEVER SUPPOSED TO FEEL THIS WAY....

Not even a day goes by when I don't think of you. You seem to spring out of nowhere into my imagination, even if I am happy or sad. Why did I fall in love with you? I do not know. I am just not able to fall out of it. It was September and I met you online ,you were different I could tell. It started with a few chats and some weeks later I discovered that I cannot stop thinking about you . I tried to read a book and there you were staring me on every page. I stayed up all night and wrote for you..poems..stories and what not.You became an integral part of my life.I remember you were the first person who took my tears in the palm of your hand and said,"Please don't cry, you are wasting a million..every time you shed these precious tears". Funny..i never thought that you would be the person who would give me only tears for the rest of my life.
Then the day came when you needed to leave the city for your better future.You said,"Don't worry..we'll be in touch". Your calls and letters came regularly, but then they stopped coming. It took you only six months.I was heart broken. Unlike you, I gave you everything I had.I tried to contact you many times..but you never replied to my calls..my letters.
Since that day I have been running from myself. I never found "ME" again.I recollect all those memories and tears fall from my eyes. But this time you are not there to hold them and say those words again. I still miss you, I still love you .The only difference is ,I don't love the man you are now. The real "YOU" is still with me .The "YOU" I loved exists no more in reality but only in my imagination. You know what, this "YOU" will be the same forever, he will never change as my feelings don't tend to change. You are not the man I loved.Strange isn't it? I am too not the girl you met long back. I never smiled wholeheartedly since 2 years 8 months 30 days 4 hours and 9 minutes....:(

P.S.-Its just a write..None of this happened..!